[ It certainly feels random to her. Did Ellana tell him about their fight--? No, doubtful. ]
My mother is the Keeper of our clan. Our leader. She's...highly respected, among the other clans, and within our clan, as someone of great wisdom and great skill with leadership. She is an exemplary Keeper, really. Her dedication to acting in the best interests of the clan has kept us going through numerous hardships.
[ She sounds like a pamphlet. Why Our Keeper Is Really Great, I Swear: An essay by Clan Ashara. ]
[ That isn't terribly far off from the sort of speech Alistair might give—out of loyalty to his country—if asked about any of its monarchs, current or former. Which isn't a great sign. He hums. ]
[ She's surprised by the question, blinking at Alistair curiously. With most people, she might give them the exact same spiel she just laid out, rephrased. But Alistair has well earned hearing her honest opinion, if that's what he wants. So it isn't until she's had a minute to mull over how to put a lifetime of complicated feelings into words that she finally speaks. ]
I'm sure you're aware that life is not easy for the Dalish. It's hard, and you must be hard in turn, if you are to survive. My mother knows that. And she has spent my life worrying that I am too...faint-hearted. So she tries to toughen me up. She...doesn't coddle me.
[ She hesitates, chewing her lip thoughtfully. She doesn't want to lay out a lifetime of mommy issues at Alistair's feet, but she doesn't want to just rattle off rhetoric. ]
--That sounds harsh. I love my mother, and I know she loves me. If she didn't, she wouldn't bother trying to make sure I'm strong enough. She wouldn't place expectations on me. But--I don't measure up to what she expects. She has been clear about that. I don't know if that's my fault, or hers.
[ She shifts, fairly sure that she's done a poor job of explaining. She can all but hear her mother hissing in the back of her mind, but Beleth shoves her aside for now. Instead, she glances up at Alistair, shrugging. ]
I apologize if that's more than you wanted to know. It's--hard. To explain properly. She loves me. I know she does.
[ If the two father-ish figures who Alistair actually likes and believes gave a damn about him hadn't (1) mostly ignored him and kept him with the dogs and horses or (2) put him through a ritual that was likely to kill him and (gently, wisely) told him to buck up when he took poorly to the news of his inevitably premature death, maybe he would be in a better position to tell Beleth that that sounds awful and of course it isn't her fault and just because people love you doesn't mean they're allowed to hurt you.
[ She stares wide-eyed at him for a moment, then ducks her head, giggling. There might be redness in her cheeks. She's not flustered, YOU'RE flustered!! Whatever weird feelings she has about her mother is able to be shoved back for now, when she has something else to focus on. ]
That's what mothers do, I suppose. They worry.
[ And her curiosity finally gets the better of her, glancing up at him curiously. ]
Why do you want to know about my mother, anyway? Were you thinking of applying to be a clanmate?
You're one of the oddest humans I've met. It's no wonder we all like you.
[ Except Merrick, maybe, but you shouldn't count him when it comes to liking people, because he doesn't like anyone. ]
I suppose that makes sense. It seems like you have no choice but to marry me.
Or. [ She's a liar, there are more choices. ] You can answer my question about why you're asking your questions. If you want my personal opinion, the latter is cheaper, easier, and won't involve you having to go kill a deer, but it is your decision.
Cheaper? I didn't take you for high-maintenance, Beleth. And-- [ and ] --I don't need a reason to ask about your mother. We're friends. I'm a curious man. Why do I need a motive?
I am not high-maintenance! [ Not financially, at least. ] But weddings cost money, don't they? Unless you're going to use your Warden requisitioning for supplies. Do you think that you could pull that off? 'I'm sorry, but I need this wedding dress to fight the Blight.'
[ He does get eyes suspiciously about his lack of motives, but Beleth will let it go, for now. He was, as he said, a friend, and friends don't usually accuse each other of barefaced lying. ]
Oh-ho, now you want a dress. Next you'll want a ring. I'll have to take one off some poor woman's finger, the Wardens will get a bad reputation and be exiled, all because you're high-maintenance.
The infertility and premature death are only excuses, [ Alistair agrees, and also silently agrees that he's cute, he knows, it's the only thing he has going for him— ] My mother turned up alive.
[ By the way. ]
It's not really important. We talked, she has reasons, it's done. It's just made me wonder, that's all.
[ Beleth opens her mouth, to attempt to say something really smooth, like she wouldn't care, certainly, you know, if that were actually relevant, and not just a joke. She is saved from any awkward attempts to not be awkward by Alistair dropping that little kernel of information, and Beleth snaps her mouth shut. Then opens it, thinks, and shuts it again. The third time is the charm. If the charm is actually saying something intelligent instead of having your mouth hang open like a fool. ]
Your mother--She isn't dead? She just...pretended to be dead? This whole time? For--30ish years? [ How old are you again Alistair. ] She just let you and your sister think that she was dead, and left the two of you to fend for yourselves? I hope her reasons were pretty damned good, Alistair, or I'll tell her exactly what I think about that.
Have you told your sister yet? From what you've said of her, I'm sure she has words, as well.
Mmm, not really my sister, as it turns out. Maybe I should tell her.
[ But then he would have to talk to her. And he's pretty sure Anora or Eamon or someone has been feeding her children to keep her from making any scenes. ]
She's an elf. My mother, I mean, not my sister. And a mage, and Orlesian. She didn't want me to... [ Deal with that. Get murdered for political reasons. Etc. ] And everyone else helped cover it up, I suppose. So that's great.
You said that I was one of the oddest Dalish you've met.
[ She flashes him a smile, before scooting over to rest her head on his shoulder, in what she hopes is some kind of manner that might offer comfort, as she has never had to try to comfort someone who has found that his mother is an Orlesian elven mage who is in fact alive and not dead. ]
So your father--that King Maric fellow. [ She says it with a certain degree of carelessness, because she doesn't really have a lot of investment in some dead shem king. ] He laid with an Orlesian elven mage and got her pregnant? I--I guess I can see why she didn't want that getting out. But still--
[ Surely she could have talked to him at some point before this??? She looks up at him, frowning. ]
How are you feeling? And I mean--for real. I promise, it won't leave this tent. But you can't tell me that you're just walking this off.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
arlathvhen) wrote2015-02-18 01:05 am
reminded me — in person, backdated vaguely
What's your mother like?
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[ It certainly feels random to her. Did Ellana tell him about their fight--? No, doubtful. ]
My mother is the Keeper of our clan. Our leader. She's...highly respected, among the other clans, and within our clan, as someone of great wisdom and great skill with leadership. She is an exemplary Keeper, really. Her dedication to acting in the best interests of the clan has kept us going through numerous hardships.
[ She sounds like a pamphlet. Why Our Keeper Is Really Great, I Swear: An essay by Clan Ashara. ]
no subject
What's she like with you, though?
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I'm sure you're aware that life is not easy for the Dalish. It's hard, and you must be hard in turn, if you are to survive. My mother knows that. And she has spent my life worrying that I am too...faint-hearted. So she tries to toughen me up. She...doesn't coddle me.
[ She hesitates, chewing her lip thoughtfully. She doesn't want to lay out a lifetime of mommy issues at Alistair's feet, but she doesn't want to just rattle off rhetoric. ]
--That sounds harsh. I love my mother, and I know she loves me. If she didn't, she wouldn't bother trying to make sure I'm strong enough. She wouldn't place expectations on me. But--I don't measure up to what she expects. She has been clear about that. I don't know if that's my fault, or hers.
[ She shifts, fairly sure that she's done a poor job of explaining. She can all but hear her mother hissing in the back of her mind, but Beleth shoves her aside for now. Instead, she glances up at Alistair, shrugging. ]
I apologize if that's more than you wanted to know. It's--hard. To explain properly. She loves me. I know she does.
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Alas. ]
Of course she does. You're very lovable.
[ He stretches, pops a shoulder joint. ]
And very tough. She shouldn't worry.
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That's what mothers do, I suppose. They worry.
[ And her curiosity finally gets the better of her, glancing up at him curiously. ]
Why do you want to know about my mother, anyway? Were you thinking of applying to be a clanmate?
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Hmm. Do you think they'd have me?
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[ She crosses her arms thoughtfully, deep in very serious contemplation. ]
You could marry me. Or any of the other Dalish. You and Merrick would make a cute couple.
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You're the oddest Dalish I've ever met.
[ That's a collective you. Beleth is slightly less odd than some of the others. ]
And Merrick--no. I'd be constantly reminded of my father.
[ Merrick, Maric. They may not even be spelled differently in Thedas' alphabet. ]
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[ Except Merrick, maybe, but you shouldn't count him when it comes to liking people, because he doesn't like anyone. ]
I suppose that makes sense. It seems like you have no choice but to marry me.
Or. [ She's a liar, there are more choices. ] You can answer my question about why you're asking your questions. If you want my personal opinion, the latter is cheaper, easier, and won't involve you having to go kill a deer, but it is your decision.
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[ He has a motive. He'll get there. ]
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[ He does get eyes suspiciously about his lack of motives, but Beleth will let it go, for now. He was, as he said, a friend, and friends don't usually accuse each other of barefaced lying. ]
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You could take it from a jeweler.
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[ By the way. ]
It's not really important. We talked, she has reasons, it's done. It's just made me wonder, that's all.
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Your mother--She isn't dead? She just...pretended to be dead? This whole time? For--30ish years? [ How old are you again Alistair. ] She just let you and your sister think that she was dead, and left the two of you to fend for yourselves? I hope her reasons were pretty damned good, Alistair, or I'll tell her exactly what I think about that.
Have you told your sister yet? From what you've said of her, I'm sure she has words, as well.
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[ But then he would have to talk to her. And he's pretty sure Anora or Eamon or someone has been feeding her children to keep her from making any scenes. ]
She's an elf. My mother, I mean, not my sister. And a mage, and Orlesian. She didn't want me to... [ Deal with that. Get murdered for political reasons. Etc. ] And everyone else helped cover it up, I suppose. So that's great.
1/3
2/3
tada
beautiful
I don't hear that one often.
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[ She flashes him a smile, before scooting over to rest her head on his shoulder, in what she hopes is some kind of manner that might offer comfort, as she has never had to try to comfort someone who has found that his mother is an Orlesian elven mage who is in fact alive and not dead. ]
So your father--that King Maric fellow. [ She says it with a certain degree of carelessness, because she doesn't really have a lot of investment in some dead shem king. ] He laid with an Orlesian elven mage and got her pregnant? I--I guess I can see why she didn't want that getting out. But still--
[ Surely she could have talked to him at some point before this??? She looks up at him, frowning. ]
How are you feeling? And I mean--for real. I promise, it won't leave this tent. But you can't tell me that you're just walking this off.
no subject
[ But he bends his hand up to ruffle her hair. ]
That King Maric fellow. I do want to go live with the Dalish.
(no subject)