[ Beleth is not oblivious, but she's more careful than she was, back when she was young and reckless, and grabbed a man she thought fancied her and kissed him senseless. She can't do that anymore, of course, but when she turns to look at Felassan, there's a moment where she stops, and thinks --
Would it be rude, to think she knew what that look meant? Would it be egotistical beyond measure, to think that someone else aside from the man she'd chased down (wow, that sounded unfortunate) would look at her in such a way? Was it selfish, to want him to? Was it a betrayal most dire of her heart, the man she had sworn a bond to?
It's easier to simply accept the contact he offers, head in a whirl as it tried to put together the puzzle pieces, even as it rested against Felassan's shoulder. It's easy to turn and examine the cloud, and give an annoyed, but unmistakably amused huff. Easy to turn her head to scold him--
And then, suddenly, not so easy, when she realizes how close their faces are, like this. Her face begins heating, and doesn't stop, even when she turns, the mutiny of red spreading from her cheeks to her ears. Very suddenly, she makes a handful of vital realizations, all tumbled together, the top one being that, no matter if she's a delusional, selfish, egotistical idiot, that she's going to have to speak to Solas. Even if he can't forgive her for what she'll have to tell him.
They said no more secrets. They said they would trust each other. That will have to include things that she had only discovered, just this moment.
Should she -- should she say something? Should she speak to Felassan first? Confirm suspicions, or make confessions? Would that gentle, handsome smile turn harsh -- or worse, piteous? Or would he realize what Beleth has occasionally felt, in the dark corners of her mind, when old anxieties begin to pile up: That she is, in truth, something terrible, unworthy of any consideration? ]
Better than a dog, I suppose. I wouldn't want someone to think I'm Ferelden.
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Would it be rude, to think she knew what that look meant? Would it be egotistical beyond measure, to think that someone else aside from the man she'd chased down (wow, that sounded unfortunate) would look at her in such a way? Was it selfish, to want him to? Was it a betrayal most dire of her heart, the man she had sworn a bond to?
It's easier to simply accept the contact he offers, head in a whirl as it tried to put together the puzzle pieces, even as it rested against Felassan's shoulder. It's easy to turn and examine the cloud, and give an annoyed, but unmistakably amused huff. Easy to turn her head to scold him--
And then, suddenly, not so easy, when she realizes how close their faces are, like this. Her face begins heating, and doesn't stop, even when she turns, the mutiny of red spreading from her cheeks to her ears. Very suddenly, she makes a handful of vital realizations, all tumbled together, the top one being that, no matter if she's a delusional, selfish, egotistical idiot, that she's going to have to speak to Solas. Even if he can't forgive her for what she'll have to tell him.
They said no more secrets. They said they would trust each other. That will have to include things that she had only discovered, just this moment.
Should she -- should she say something? Should she speak to Felassan first? Confirm suspicions, or make confessions? Would that gentle, handsome smile turn harsh -- or worse, piteous? Or would he realize what Beleth has occasionally felt, in the dark corners of her mind, when old anxieties begin to pile up: That she is, in truth, something terrible, unworthy of any consideration? ]
Better than a dog, I suppose. I wouldn't want someone to think I'm Ferelden.
[ Stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid. ]